Insecure Writers Support Group

Yes. I’m here. I’m alive. Not sure who may have noticed but I’ve been ‘away’ for about a week and a half. And this isn’t due to any reason in particular. Well. One reason….ridiculous waves of insecurity. In the past month, save the posts for the blog, I haven’t looked at my WIP. At all. I’m not sure why. I don’t know if it’s because of external factors like everyday life or humongous excuses but to be honest, I haven’t felt that overwhelming need to write and it’s scaring me.

Of course, we all go through stages of not being overly inspired or driven….but this has gone on for a while now and I cannot seem to get out of the groove.

It’s not that I think I’m not good enough. I know I can write. I need an antidote. What do you do to get out of your icky non writing funk? Just keep writing? Yes, heard that one before. Many times. I’m envious of the folk that actually do write everyday, regardless of how they feel. I know that schedules help me a lot but like exercise, I start fantastically and it just all goes downhill from there until the excuses make more sense than the discipline.

A while ago I mentioned that Greek music drives me to write. Especially with my current WIP as it is so emotionally charged and it really relates to the dramatic Greek lyrics. Last Saturday, I listened to some Greek music. I started experiencing that familiar stirring you get when you have to grab the first piece of paper you see and the closest thing to a writing implement – be it a lip pencil, eye liner or, lo! a pen or pencil – but no. I ignored it. And I felt so damn guilty for the rest of the day. As if I ignored a screaming, hungry, desperate child.

I don’t know where or how it began. I just know I’d like this gone. As of tomorrow, I’ll be posting as normal. I have to fight this little anti-writing demon. Send that sucker back to the pits of hell where it belongs!

 

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About Virginia

Writer, reader, crossword puzzler and conspiracy theorist.

11 Responses to “Insecure Writers Support Group”

  1. Maybe start my editing old work? Once you’re in the swing of writing, something excellent might just come your way 🙂

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    • That’s a really good idea. I’ve got a ton of short stories I wrote when I was younger. I could go through them and see if I can re-work any of them. It sounds like a fun exercise. Thanks for your suggestion 🙂

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  2. From what I have read of your excerpts, I can safely say you are a good writer. Your main character is tight, palpable and well constructed. From everything you have said/shown us the story is important to you and I believe that it will make its way out. So, in the meantime, listen to all the Greek music you can, write something unrelated. A Haiku perhaps? They seem to be trending hot right now. Or some little 1500 word short story or flash fiction piece. Yes, writing through a funk might work, but maybe you just need to change focus for a bit. This sort of writing lethargy is why I tend to blast out a flash fiction piece or short story at some point during a longer work. Best of luck, I know you’ll succeed no matter what you do!

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    • Thanks so much Steve, it really means a lot for you to say that 🙂
      You know, there was a local short story competition running recently and I didn’t enter it even though I had every intention to. Silly me. I agree with you – doing something else, writing some flash or poetry – this will get me motivated again because you’re right, my story is very important and I really do want to write it.
      Thanks again for your support 🙂

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  3. This might surprise you, but I went through a long period in my life where I wrote absolutely nothing, and didn’t consider myself a writer at all. I write pretty much every day now, and I attribute it to the fact that I write mostly for myself. Of course, I do intend (insecurities or not!) to share much of what I write, but always beneath it all, the impulse to write comes from wanting to make something that I would enjoy. Sometimes it even feels selfish to think about it that way.
    Perhaps part of what lies behind your reluctance to return to the WIP is that you’re not sure why you’re writing it? Who are you writing it for? Do you feel guilty for the time you spend with it? Do you worry that it might not be ‘good’ and hence be considered a waste of time? (And from what I’ve seen, it is very good!)
    Perhaps if you realize that writing is something you do for yourself first, you’ll reignite the fire!

    I look forward to seeing more of your posts and poetry. 🙂

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    • Thank you so much Kirsten, what you said is really encouraging.
      Asking myself why I write is a really good idea because at times I do think about why I’m doing it. Does it serve a purpose? What am I trying to say? And then the dreaded self doubt kicks in and it tells me that the WIP serves no purpose at all. That I have nothing to say. Infact, I love the story, and I want to write it. So I think you’re right, it’s just a question of ploughing through and writing even when I dont feel like it sometimes.
      Thanks again Kirsten 🙂

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  4. (((((Hugs)))))

    The thing that really stood out in this post was the fact that you said “I know I can write.” WOW…re-read that honey. Be proud that you said that, I can’t! Lol 😉

    Seriously, you know you can write, you have nothing to prove, so perhaps you just need a break from it. You’ll never STOP writing, because it’s part of you. So perhaps just listen to your own body, do something else creative, read lots and I’m SURE it won’t be long before you’re back exactly where you want to be 🙂

    Xx

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    • Thats a lovely thing to say 🙂 Thanks x
      You should definitely shout it from the rooftops, Vikki – you’re a fantastic writer!
      Taking a break is a good idea – I just don’t want it to be a long break…..I know I won’t stop writing but I’m the queen of procrastination! 🙂

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  5. I so know your pain. I suggest you make a public proclamation to your blog audience that you will post something -even if it’s just a quote you like – every single day no matter what and how sucky of a mood your are in. That helped me in so many ways and held me accountable to myself. Now I’ve said I will do it three times a week but I was in way better spirits and in a generally better overall flow when I did it everyday.

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